retro.pizza is one of the many independent Mastodon servers you can use to participate in the fediverse.
A poly-fandom instance for nerds to talk about nerd culture. No Nazis, no TERFs.

Server stats:

303
active users

Folks we are about an hour out from the weekly monster movie watch party. It's a big ol' tootstorm, so if you don't wanna join in I'd suggest filtering the hashtag.

If you DO want to join in, though, this week we're watching KRULL (1983), a sword-and-sorcery flop featuring a bunch of babyfaced future stars!

The movie's available on Tubi, or from Archive.org: archive.org/details/krull.-198

Hit play at 9pm Eastern and toot about it with us!

15-ish minutes until ! Get your snacks together and cue the movie up! Or set up your hashtag filter to avoid it! This is your final warning! Anything you still can't deal with is therefore your own problem!

Wow, this film is really two hours long, huh. Gird your loins.

💡 TURN DOWN YOUR LIGHTS 💡

(where appli-Krull-ble)

That's some good fantasy wailing.

Dicken Ashworth, or Ash Dickensworth

Once again, upskirt shots of a spaceship.

Still, nice to see driftwood repurposed like that. Usually it's just greebling as far as the eye can see.

Another natural disaster caused by Space X :/

Poooooppies will make us sleep!

"He's got HUUUUGE... tracts of land!"

They'll have a kid with a *remarkable* hat.

Wow, Eddington looks different with hair.

"Wouldn't you jump for me?"

Ma'am

MAWWAGE

Mawwage is what bwings us twogethaah twoday

Yeah, this is kinda like if Excalibur and Star Wars had a baby. A weird, slightly unsettling baby.

They're killing the wedding guests! I was wrong, they're not Stormtroopers, they're a bunch of Lancelots.

Parry, parry, thrust, thrust, GOOD!

oh my god they're doing the "swinging on the chandelier cord" bit unironically :D

And so the forces of evil killed the hero and triumphed over the land! The end! Weird movie, but at least it's short.

Yeah, Freddie Jones is 100% too good for this film.

"I'll find men on the way."

We'll make a stop at Accountemps.

"Am I that man?"

Generally speaking if you have to ask, the answer is no >_>

"Hi folks, I'm a mountain. Just wanna put in a good word for plate tectonics while the camera lingers on me. Thanks for stopping by!"

Seriously though, the soundtrack sits front and center and shouts, "THIS IS EPIC GOD DAMN IT, ACKNOWLEDGE HOW EPIC THIS IS"

...Okay for a second there I thought we were gonna go for a third week in a row with a silicone prop nipple in our movie and I was gonna throw a fit.

Oh, it's a lava cookie with a free prize inside.

...Okay so the princess's half of the story is just gonna be A Clockwork Orange, huh?

The movie: A glaive is a five-pointed magical ninja star

You: A glaive is a polearm

Me, a nerd: A glaive is a bouncy stick with a bug friend :D

Oh no, it's the funny companion :/

That's what happens when you fail your Wild Magic check.

...Ergo, huh. We're gonna see too much of him, get Ergo poisoning :/

Our hero is being hounded by wandering trumpets.

Aaaaaand there's a botched stealth check.

"Is it foolish to fight for your home?"

I dunno, are we getting a lend-lease program? Are the sanctions still up? Do we get Starlink access?

Oh, he's getting his hand stamped. He gets back in for free.

Our wizard's kind of a liability here, huh.

Good to see they're leaving the Redshirts behind.

So what do you figure the under/over is on Muttonchop Gandalf there eating it before the end of the movie?

@CactuarJoe

It does sooo much heavy lifting

@CactuarJoe
I wish they'd split the money better between the music and the cinematography.

@CactuarJoe Y'know I could just turn off my monitor and it'd be 100% legit epic, no notes

@diazona Yeah honestly the visuals kind of ruin the soundtrack :P