retro.pizza is one of the many independent Mastodon servers you can use to participate in the fediverse.
A poly-fandom instance for nerds to talk about nerd culture. No Nazis, no TERFs.

Server stats:

305
active users

He's gone, just let him go. Just let him go, it's better this way.

Our hero meets the Moon Men and tries to sell the cottage to THEM, too.

Nice reflector, I'm assuming you need to change the light direction to solve the puzzle and get to the Master Sword.

A Selunite!? We're worshippers of Shar, kill them all!

You can tell they're evil because they sound like the dastardly radio scanner instead of the good and pure Bluetooth receiver.

Yeah, never trust the English in a First Contact situation. :/

"No, don't kill them! I have poxy blankets we could use instead!"

Yeah lesson one is never bring the investors on the expedition.

Oh man, Kate has doomed our heroes to a lingering, suffocating death! You go girl! Excellent work, finally showing good judgment.

...Oh, nevermind. They're literally Your Princess Is In Another Castle-ing us here. :/ :/ :/

...Suddenly they have the strength of ten Cabots?

NOW who won't shut the goddamn greenhouse door, old man?

"What is it?"

Well, you just teleported, that's pretty impressive.

AT LAST

SOME HARRYHAUSEN

That is the LOUDEST caterpillar I've ever seen.

YES, STONE THE OBNOXIOUS PROFESSOR

KILL, CATERPILLAR, KILL!!

Personally, I trust Mothra's children to be judge jury and executioner.

NOOO, NOT THE CATERPILLAR

TAKE ME INSTEAD

Oh they've got a voice modulator.

CATERPILLARS DON'T HAVE SKELETONS

FOUL

"...And here you see our Mtn Dew storage facilities..."

Oh, this is where they keep the sailors. You know, the Sailors On The Moon, the ones with harpoons.

They're generating their power by shining sunlight on one of my Christmas ornaments.

"Entirely reasonable I suppose"

So you're a Tory, then, Prof? :/

Don't worry, STRAIGHT WHITE MALE IMPERIALISM WILL SAVE THE DAY

Disco's done for the evening. Y'don't have to go home but y'can't stay here.

"I'm so worried about Arnold."

Yeah, at this rate I'll never be implicated in a real estate scheme again!

Ten bucks says he gets violent with the sleeping Selenites.

They're sacrificing the prof to Tezcatlipoca.

And of course the natives are incredibly intelligent and well-spoken and the Englishman is shouting and monosyllabic.

"Tell you of war? Hold up, let me get the conman in here..."

"Cabot, come on, it's time to show them English violence!"

Lets be real here, the queen alien's deductions are 100% on the mark here and preventing Victorian Englishmen from returning to Earth with the knowledge of a civilization they could overrun and devour was ABSOLUTELY THE CORRECT THING TO DO.

"Well I was going to refuse to help because you destroyed all hope of communicating with an alien race and fucked First Contact beyond all reason, but since you asked nicely, sure, I'll help."

COME ON SELENITES, KILL THE IMPERIALS!

The really tragic thing is that WASN'T the longest flashback in history.

Yeah, those Ken dolls better get out of there fast.

AND SO WE DIDN'T NEED TO LEARN ANYTHING ABOUT IMPERIALISM

...Y'know, the "one tiny virus kills the mighty alien species" doesn't really land when WE were the invaders. Like, I was joking earlier about the pox blankets but that's KIND OF EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED HERE

:/ :/ :/

"And so one asshole Victorian expedition murdered an entire uncontacted civilization. We now close our film on the most violent member of the expedition, giggling as he watches the last remains of the lost civilization he helped exterminate crumble into dust. Hip hip hooray!"