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This film wasn't written, it was stitched together out of a vat of cliches. #Monsterdon

He shot Colonel Sanders! Oh the fried chicken! #Monsterdon

Not gonna lie, I was expecting Brent Spiner in there. #Monsterdon

"Resistance is--"

*paramount cocks a rifle offstage*

"...Useless!" #Monsterdon

"He's forcing me to relive yanni's greatest hits in my mind! Oh god!" #Monsterdon

Sinister xylophone. #Monsterdon

FOLLOW MY ORDERS

BY MY BEEFY CHIN #Monsterdon

Everyone in this movie owned an iMac and thought the Macarena was amazing. #Monsterdon

Couldn't have a moment where explosions weren't happening, could you movie? #Monsterdon

The motorcycles are a *metaphor* you see #Monsterdon

Gay sex is *so complicated* good lord... #Monsterdon

Hm. Nope, you totally lost me, I have no idea where these two are in relation to each other now. #Monsterdon

C'mon, do the Akira slide, you know you want to. #Monsterdon

The cinematic equivalent of a six year old on three bowls of Sugar Frosted Cocoa Bombs at 6am. #Monsterdon

Oh yeah, Godzilla's kid is in this one. I forgot. #Monsterdon

"I think I'll call him Milla!"

He'll star in multiple Resident Evil movies and a weird Joan of Arc thing! #Monsterdon

"Why didn't you kill me!"

Well, I can't say, it's only 2004. #Monsterdon

"I was on the Gotengo. I shot that missile."

I spent thirty seconds curling my lip at the camera like an enraged ape. #Monsterdon

Yes, First Officer Exposition, that's what I intend. #Monsterdon

AND WE HAVE A TITLE DROP good work everyone #Monsterdon

This soundtrack really is too much. I need to fight a Final Fantasy boss to this. #Monsterdon

Did we just slip into a different movie? #Monsterdon

Eeey, nice spittake, well done :D #Monsterdon

Gargan is greeting them with fireworks, how nice! #Monsterdon

Welp, so much for the cappucino guy. #Monsterdon

G-man like, I *just got up* and there's this kusarigama fucker and you know what? I'm not having it today. #Monsterdon

This movie is what plays in an 8-year-old's head when he gets extra mozzarella sticks. #Monsterdon

...You know how busy this movie is? How impossible to follow this movie is?

I KEEP FORGETTING MINILLA IS IN IT

XDXDXD

this soundtrack I seriously cannot fucking take it

People forget Godzilla spent three years as a pro-wrestler in Seattle before going pro ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

"But why is Godzilla destroying the city?"

It's his deal, man. That's what he does. #Monsterdon

That's... Not at *all* what happened old man. #Monsterdon

"What was the point of it all?"

Well, you got that red leather jacket. That's nifty. #Monsterdon

"It's my mission."

I'm a flat character, this is an action movie and doesn't give two shits about motivations or character development. C'mon, it's about time for another explosion. #Monsterdon

You think we'll get a rocket-powered drop kick out of Godzilla this time? #Monsterdon

Aaaand it's a line drive, just foul, good souvenir for some fan... #Monsterdon

Love the shot of Godzilla in front of Fuji. Like, Fuck Yeah Japan. #Monsterdon

I have never seen a film so deadly earnest be so *absolutely hilarious.* #Monsterdon

"There's a way to destroy the Xillian ship, a small thermal exhaust port below the main.." #Monsterdon

Kirby Superstar did it better. #Monsterdon

Alien leader just lost the same boss fight for the tenth time, he's running out of quarters. #Monsterdon

How come the captain speaks with the same cadence as Rowsdower? #Monsterdon

Yes, thank you, we understand the concept of livestock. #Monsterdon

Oh, nice. Mewtwo. #Monsterdon

I think after this film they had to stop making Godzilla films just because nobody could think of anything else to do that Final Wars didn't at least try. #Monsterdon

So did I hear that right, the aliens are looking to steal our precious bodily fluids? #Monsterdon

"You're a ubermensch, dude"

hoo boy 9_9 #Monsterdon

So when does he grow a tail? #Monsterdon

Apparently evolved mutants get +1 on slap attacks. #Monsterdon

Stabbed with a moth knife, that's gonna leave a mark. #Monsterdon

We get it, you saw The Matrix. #Monsterdon

Temu Stalin, least believable Matrix man ever #Monsterdon

Oh come on, a slapfight? *Seriously*? Embarrassing. #Monsterdon

I'm sorry, I don't believe ANY of this. #Monsterdon

They are hiding behind ONE PILLAR

MOVE A FOOT TO YOUR LEFT

OR RIGHT

AND KILL THEM

"We accept your noble offer of fisticuffs, sir! Haveatchu!"

oh *come on*

Some *very* early 2000s sexism on display here. #Monsterdon

WE GET IT

YOU SAW THE MATRIX #Monsterdon

Also the last twenty minutes of The Temple of Doom, that was unexpected. #Monsterdon

As we all know, martial arts at its highest level is all about rotating in midair. #Monsterdon