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And now, loving aerial shots of Rat's Ass Mississippi.

The traditional tender '70s love ballad that has *absolutely jack shit to do with the plot of the movie it's on*

Yay :D

The tender love ballad, the blatant disrespect for the environment, the sickly green stationwagon... Aaaah, hello again, 1970s.

"Show me that you love me... One more time... Rip my head off~ in the booooooog~ ♪"

Aaah we are *overflowing* with class here.

They're shooting day for

bog

That's your grandparents, Joel.

This is like Married With Children except the characters are even more unlikeable. Really a remarkable achievement, actually.

Aw, Mae gets to leave the film first. Lucky lady, I'm jealous.

And she opens the car door and Octaman jumps out!

More undercooked pork specimens of the 1970s.

"My god, whatever did this was capable of tearing a sheet of tent nylon CLEAN IN HALF!"

So now our disgusting hunters vanish from the film and leave us with the porky cops, right? I'd almost prefer that.

Not gonna lie, I was really expecting Barbara Hale in that role.

70s COP VIOLENCE

CINEMA VERITE, GENTLEMEN

"Two young lives, wasted like that!"

Yeah, being in this film was totally avoidable.

Ah yes, Bog Dracula (1979)

...what in the fucking

why are we being assaulted by Hong Kong Fooey-voice here :/

Oh NO, a COP DIED

How

Terrible

Now don't you boys give Mikey no matches.

Whoa, his suit blends in with the brick wall behind him. He's a taupe chameleon!

Yes, just enter the hobo's stinky palace, I'm sure this won't be creepy at all.

See, stuff like this is why I watch these kinds of movies. *Absolute shit* for twenty minutes and then they stumble into some of the coolest shit you'll ever see :D

Man, imagine if they'd made the witch look like this ON PURPOSE

HA HA HA

The castle of AAAAARGH! :D :D :D

You think the Bog Witch is in the market for an apprentice?

...You are not going to try a romance subplot with

oh ICK

"It isn't necessary."

"No?"

No, we've sickened the audience already, nobody's gonna notice what we do now.

WHERE IS THE GIANT MOSQUITO BOG DRACULA WHEN YOU NEED IT

What is it with the 70s and greasy sex scenes? Ugh.

FADE TO BLACK

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD FADE TO BLACK

Man, these two. Not since Barbara Hale and Doughy Guy in The Giant Spider Invasion.

Oh, well then, by all means Mario Mario, go jump into the lake with a five pound bomb on your chest.

"That is not dead which can eternal BOG"

Ah yes, the wonderful days before environmental impact statements >_>

"Thank god none of us were wearing ear protection!"

"WHAT?"

"I SAID THANK GOD NONE OF US WERE WEARING EAR PROTECTION!"

Oooo I hope they're dead :D

"Son of a bitch!" *hits car roof*

...

*sound of him hitting the car roof plays*

"Everything's fine but I do have a problem."

Then everything's NOT fine, you ambulatory pork roast.

Y'know, you gotta be really dedicated to be a Bog Hag in Wisconsin. Like, that's not a prestigious hag post, you get no respect.

It's nice that they were able to rent the high school biology classroom for this scene.

WISCONSIN'S FINEST ON FULL ALERT

"These are mucous-producing cells"

Yes, we've met the cast thank you.

"Mineralized tissue... Slimy"

WE'VE MET THE CAST. THANK YOU.

wait

Metal. Long beak. Made of molybdenum.

CROW T ROBOT!?

Huh. So *this* is Tommy Bartlett's Water Show.

Huh, monster laid gacha eggs.

Diver man to the rescue! Diver man AWAY!

"The victim drew a sketch, you wanna see it?"

"Well goodbye, dummies."

Bastard stole my closing line for the film :/

Again, this is gonna be like The Giant Spider Invasion and they're gonna forget the flares while the sheriff gets eaten by the monster butt-first.

"You heard the man, get crackin'!"

Like you in the storage room, sir?

WHAT DID I TELL YOU get eaten butt-first, twerp

HA HA HA HA HA HA

What a GREAT costume! :D :D :D

He's not Boggy, he's Foamy :D

Oh hey, he stole the cop's plane from The Wicker Man

@CactuarJoe For the WIN… at least in my book,